So long, summer.

Labels: By Jessie Fey on Wednesday, September 14, 2011

Well, Sarah went back to school last week, which means that summer has officially ended. Before she leaves for Boston every year, we tend to go through our favorite parts of summer and make a sort of unwritten list of things we think were cool and/or ridiculous. This summer may not have been as stellar as last summer, but I thought I’d turn that unwritten list to a written one…in no particular order.

1. The Palm Springs Trip – We had just gotten out of school, and it was the first all girls trip my group of friends had been on. On the way there, Kimmi, Margeaux, Sarah, Katie and I made a list of everything we wanted to do over summer (including Margeaux’s “M”-themed birthday bash that I think eventually got turned into a “Margeaux” themed birthday bash). I don’t know that anything from the list was checked off, but we did have a pretty bitchin’ time lounging and bringing the ruckus all at once. 

2. The night Sarah was unintentionally racist- It was late, we were hungry, Sarah drunkenly ordered pizza and cinnasticks (“Are you SURE you got the cinnasticks?”). The pizza came.
Sarah: Oh, hi! How long have you been here?
Pizza Lady: Since 2008.
Lauren and Me: *silent laughter behind door*
Sarah: Oh, okay. Thank you.
Door closes.
Seriously, lady? It’s 2 a.m. and you really thought Sarah was asking how long you’ve been in the country, as opposed to how long you’ve been waiting at the door? Shucks, we really must have made a bad impression.

3. The week Lauren was home- I happened to be house sitting that week, and Lauren basically moved in with me. It was the most time we’d spent together probably since graduating high school, and it was quite nice. I blogged about a particularly sweet night we had with Rachel that could be my favorite night of summer.

4. Margeaux’s non-themed birthday bash- What started out as a terrible day turned into a really fun night with the crew. Oh, and Margeaux lives on a cliff in Laguna, so that wasn’t bad, either.

5. The Britney Spears’ concert- Sarah’s roommate from Boston was in town, and Sarah ended up getting us awesome seats. It may have been more of a Sarah atmosphere than a Jess atmosphere, but hot damn we boogied that night.

6. Sarah ordering at the Krispy Kreme drive-thru- Sarah turned 21 at midnight, and after we went to TGI Friday’s to celebrate she had to have Krispy Kremes. She also decided she had to order and was slurring her words the entire time, which eventually led to, “I’m sorry, it’s my 21st birthday and I’m really drunk.”

7. Aunt Celine’s wedding, but mostly the week after- It was a lovely affair, but I also got to take care of Julia for a few days while my aunt was on her honeymoon. She’s just the coolest kid ever, and I was glad I had some time to spend with her before they moved.

8. Getting my first tattoo- Now I want 100 more.

9. Avett Brothers’ show- So, so, so, so good. Tears were shed, and I wasn’t the only one.

10. The Jack Grisham reading at work- This was actually the first official “book signing” I’d ever been to, and it happened to be at my work. I read the book a couple weeks before, and it’s pretty gnarly. I wasn’t so sure how the night was going to go, or what Jack would be like. A lot of the book involves him torturing/tormenting people and doing a lot of crazy shit, but he was a totally normal dude.  There was also a Q&A portion after he read. A lot of people asked him what advice he’d give to people who have a lot of the same issues that he had, and he basically answered with a variation of “I don’t know, I’m not a doctor” every time. I liked that.

(You can find the book at :) 

Cups of Coffee

Labels: , By Jessie Fey on Thursday, July 28, 2011

The first one I enjoyed: on my way to a 7:30 a.m. writing class during my senior year of high school. August, 2008.
Since Christmas, 2009: from my single-cup Keurig coffeemaker that brews the perfect cup. I reheat it twice before finishing.
On school or work days: before I leave, a few sips while I close my eyes. The rest on the ten-minute drive down Chapman Avenue.
At the Starbucks on Chapman Avenue: while studying for finals, visiting old friends, eavesdropping, during a job interview, and when my aunt told me she and my cousin would be moving. Also while beginning to write this while avoiding studying for finals.
On summer mornings when my mom is home, as we solve the problems of the world together. Just not our own.
After breaking up with a boyfriend I loved but hadn’t been in love with for a while, and understanding that such a thing was a) possible and b) alright. May, 2010.
Throughout my trip to Hungary last summer, when no amount could keep me from falling asleep between teaching English classes. June 25-July 14, 2010.
The morning of my twentieth birthday, thinking about how weird birthdays are, and how I’d like to hang on to a few parts of nineteen a little longer. Maybe a few parts of the rest of the teens, too. March 26, 2011.
Last night, to keep me awake long enough to finish a story.
In Mammoth last summer before hiking. The girls poured coffee while the boys poured beer, and we scoffed at them. July, 2010.
At dinner with my oldest friend. We talked about how much we loved it. Winter, 2010.
At a café by the beach with a boy I spent an effortlessly splendid summer with, as he told me adding sweetener would ruin it. He drank a hot chocolate. Summer, 2010.
April of this year, while sitting on my bathroom floor with the lights off, using the leaking faucet as an anesthetic.
June of this year, while walking on a boardwalk in San Diego with three of my favorite people, as we discussed how much life is going to change.
My first introduction. After I spit it out my mom said to me, wise as she is, “Someday you’ll understand.” Winter, 2004.
Driving home from Las Vegas on three hours of sleep with the alcohol still seeping through my pores. I fell asleep at the wheel and we’re all alive. December 23, 2010.
The morning I found out I got the job. January 1, 2011. Actually, it was probably the afternoon, considering the date.
In Long Beach Airport waiting to board my first solo flight, trying to decide how I felt about being alone in an airport and all the metaphors that go along with it. April 16, 2011.
Eating breakfast with my best friend before leaving Boston, as we discussed the previous night’s success(es). April 21, 2011.
On the plane ride home, hoping I’d touch down anywhere else. April 21, 2011.
Thursday mornings this summer, slugging on the couch watching really shitty reality television that I record. (Don’t worry, I don’t watch that show about weird addictions. However, as a psych major I feel it might be necessary…for scientific purposes. Just like it’s necessary for me to watch Teen Mom…for sociological purposes.)
Last week while working at the Costa Mesa store, sullenly going over the latest idea for the novel that may not ever get written. July 22, 2011.
Tomorrow morning on the way to work, joyfully scribbling down in my Field Notes notebook the next idea for the novel that will get written, eventually.

Labels: , By Jessie Fey on Monday, June 27, 2011

He’d been writing for over an hour, and I would interrupt his latest idea to read out loud without asking permission. I knew he found it romantic and I knew he’d want his wife to read to him someday; on the porch of their country home, surrounded by acres of green; on an island far away from the things he was afraid of, where people were scarce and love was plenty; or maybe right here in his room…both of us watching the seasons change and gripping fiercely the hope that our feelings never will. 

Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Script

Labels: By Jessie Fey on Wednesday, May 11, 2011

About a week or so ago at work, a “let’s discuss ways we can improve things” meeting eventually evolved into a “let’s encourage Jess on her dream of being a writer and discuss different films that excel in the area of character development” conversation. Yeah, it happened. One of my bosses suggested watching “Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind.” Last night, I finally got around to watching it.

Now, I went into this movie being told by one boss that it was the greatest love story of all time. Another boss told me he hated it. Bold statements, especially the first.

So I watched it. As the title of this post suggests, the script of this film is flawless. Listen to that first conversation between Joel and Clem on the train. If you don’t have an understanding for each of their characters by the end of that conversation, well, I would probably just tell you to stop watching. You’re probably one of those people who like the Twilight series more than the Harry Potter series. Actually, you’re probably the person that hasn’t read either series but still waits in line to see the next installment at midnight. And your favorite character in HP is Harry. Crucio! (You probably don’t know what that means.) I don’t know if I’m proud of or seriously concerned of my ability to work Harry Potter into everything.

Alright, back to it. This is when a movie review would put that “spoiler alert” warning thing up. It means to stop reading if you don’t want to know what happens in the movie. **Spoiler Alert**

As I watched Joel try to save his memories of Clem, I curled up into the fetal position and let the tears flow. It was to the point where I dramatically let them drip down my face and soak my pillow. No shame. Not only is Joel attempting to salvage Clem’s memory, he’s also forced to relive his memories with her for the last time. Regret is both inevitable and unbearable.

Clementine: I wish you'd stayed.
Joel:  I wish I'd stayed too. Now I wish I'd stayed. I wish I'd done a lot of things. Oh, God, I wish I had... I wish I'd stayed. I do.

(There’s at least one person that you want to have that exact exchange with. You need to be Joel, and say it, or you need to be Clem, and hear it.) Finding out about the relationship between Kirsten Dunst’s character and the doctor (whose names I can’t remember) didn’t help. Blindsided. She had her memory of their relationship erased and she fell in love with him again. That’s not really what the movie is about, though. Joel and Clem find themselves in a rather odd situation. Neither of them have memories of their first relationship, but they’re listening to tapes of themselves talk about the other person in pretty intimate ways. They’re told from the start what they’ll hate about each other and how fucked up their relationship is going to be. And what do they do? They say, “Okay.” But it’s so much more than “okay.” It’s “Yeah, we’re going to piss each other off. We’re going to bitch at each other a lot, and this is probably going to end the same way as it did the first time. But we don’t care.” To quote Matt, “’O.K.’ was the most sincere and touching version of ‘I love you’ that I have ever heard.” That’s what it’s all about, really. Joel and Clem being willing to go through hell all over again because they know, even if they fail miserably, it’ll be worth it. That’s when you know you love/loved someone. When you can look back on something that didn’t end the way you wanted it to, something that caused you a lot of heartache, and still want to do it all over again for the sake of what it was.

The point when calm tears turned into body-wrenching sobs?

Clementine: This is it, Joel. It’s going to be gone soon.
Joel: I know.
Clementine: What do we do?
Joel: Enjoy it.

Quite possibly the most beautiful idea that ever floated.

Labels: By Jessie Fey on Sunday, April 24, 2011

Because of the nature of her occupation, Madeline Hayward was an expert at empty promises.  Then Boris Hull called, and she never lied again.  

Come hang out with me, learn about 80s punk rock, and listen to some live music.

Labels: By Jessie Fey on Tuesday, April 12, 2011

On April 30, Moonlight Graham is hosting the official Orange County premiere of “A History Lesson Part One,” a documentary by Dave Travis about punk rock in LA in the 80s. After the screening, Modern Puppetry and Twisted Roots will do a short set.  If you’d like to go, let me know and I can grab you some tickets! Check out the film's website: 

Here’s the schedule for the night:

7pm-8pm…..”A History Lesson” Screening 8pm-8:30pm……Modern Puppetry 8:45pm-9:15pm…..Twisted Roots (Pat Smear, Paul Roessler, Gary Jacoby, etc) 

Labels: By Jessie Fey on Monday, April 11, 2011

“Let’s run away,” she said, tangling her legs in his, “and do something self-destructive.”

He kissed her forehead.  “I think we already are, sweetheart.”